Custom of "Wife Kidnapping": Is it Legal?

"Kidnapping a Wife" is a distinctive custom of the H'Mong people, typically occurring at the market during the Tet festival. If a couple is in love but lacks the funds for a bridal price or the girl's parents do not consent, they will plan for the young man to perform the wife-kidnapping ritual. On the appointed day, the young man, along with his friends, will appear to "kidnap" the girl and take her to his home. Although the girl is aware beforehand, she will still feign surprise and cry out. After being taken, the girl will stay at the young man's house for three days, after which she will be released back home, at which point the man's family must bring betrothal gifts. However, if during the three days at the young man's house the girl successfully escapes, the young man's family must offer gifts to the girl's family to "restore honor." If the girl does not escape or cannot escape, the young man's family will visit the girl's home to arrange the marriage. If the young man kidnaps the girl but she does not consent, the bridal price will be set very high, and if the young man cannot meet this price, he will be fined by the villagers, typically having to treat the entire village to food and drink for seven consecutive days.

Wife-kidnapping is a cultural beauty if carried out according to the proper sequence as described above, with both the man and woman consenting. However, this beauty fades if the wife-kidnapping occurs spontaneously, arbitrarily, and regardless of the girl's consent.

Even though wife-kidnapping is a long-standing custom among ethnic minority groups, it must comply with legal regulations (regarding age, mutual consent, etc.) to avoid exploiting it to infringe upon the rights of women and children.

If the act of wife-kidnapping is distorted or abused, it not only becomes a condemned superstition but also shows signs of violating the law on illegal detention as stipulated in Article 123 of the 1999 Penal Code.

Furthermore, if the act of kidnapping a girl to be a wife is against her will, it constitutes a violation of the Marriage and Family Law. The perpetrator may be criminally prosecuted for the offense of forcing marriage or obstructing voluntary and progressive marriage under Article 146 of the 1999 Penal Code.

Anyone who coerces marriage or obstructs voluntary, progressive marriage by maltreating, abusing, mentally intimidating, or using other tricks may be fined from 100,000 VND to 300,000 VND (Article 55 of Decree 167/2013/ND-CP).

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